Monday, April 12, 2010


Today I'm green with envy.
Some people just make it look so damn easy. They stay positive all the time, and make good choices, and don't tangle the lines of communication, and wish wellness to all they encounter, and cook delicious new, healthful meals each and every night, and don't take things personally or turn every little thing into a huge drama. Those people are so with it. Sometimes it kind of makes me sick. I know I'm a mess but at least I'm interesting! (That's such a weak argument - those other, more perfect type people are super interesting too - way more so than me in fact because they have time to develop and realize their creativity more fully...)
But I'm not that - and I don't know if I ever will be. I fall victim to negative thought patterns all the fricking time, I mis-communicate with those closest to me on almost a daily basis, I mentally curse people who cross my path and piss me off just about every time it happens, I make box dinners all the time because I am too tired to make something from scratch or we are too poor to afford better food, AND I become offended and hurt WAY too easily.
So what I want to know is - how do I get to be like them? Balanced. Peaceful. Happy.

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